ArmadilloCon, Day 1

I'm at ArmadilloCon, my 1st SF Literature conference. Not too much going on Friday night; we're in the hotel bar, drinking coffee and blogging. No issues tonight; going to see if one develops over the weekend for me to blog about. Back to my novel (the one I'm writing, not the one I'm reading).

My First Time

Last night the four of us went to a BDSM play party. It was the second for the three of them as a M/s triplet, and the first for me overall. It all went very smoothly; most everyone was friendly, and I got some pointers on using a bullwhip, as well as some basic rope work. I definitely want to get some of both and practice!

Interesting experience in the beginning of the evening. We were all introducing ourselves, and telling about what we like to do in the scene (for those of you who don't know, there is an immense variety of things to be and do that fall under the category of BDSM). Since I was the 2nd person to introduce themselves (well, really the 1st since emmie got stage fright so bad she couldn't talk!), and I was still learning all about the scene and how to articulate it, I just said that I was new and still learning what I liked. Now, that's true to a certain extent, but after hearing what the others had to say over the next 15 minutes, I think that I could have come up with a more accurate answer. If I had gone last, I probably would have said something like this: "I've been in the scene for a few months. I'm a service dom. I like impact play and non-consent play. I'm interested in learning more about rope play and edge play. Basically, I'm willing to try anything."

This brings up the question for the evening. How much of BDSM is innate to your character, and how much is learned?

From my perspective, all the areas of BDSM are learned. Layered into that, your personality and preferences seep into your learnings, guiding your preferences. For example, from my martial arts experience I've been able to dish out as well as receive punishment. The bruises I came home with I bore with pride, because they showed how I endured my own mistakes in order to learn how NOT to get hit, while learning to defeat someone else. The mindset is completely different from receiving impact play. I could easily learn to take a flogging, but I'd much rather give one.

Corollary: Can anyone find something they enjoy in BDSM, or are some people incapable of being anything but vanilla? My perspective: Theoretically, anyone can if they want to, but statistically some people are much less likely to embrace their inner pervert than others.

Please respond, comment, etc.

First Time Post

Welcome, one and all. My goal is simple:

1. to rant, rave, pontificate, and conjecture on anything and everything;
2. to invite discussion, feedback, comments, and verbal dueling in general.

If you are familiar with the Dilbert.com blog, you'll have an idea of what I want to do.

I have work, school, and a very large household that I function in, so I may not be able to blog every day. That being said, I will attempt to respond in a consistent, timely way.

Thanks for participating. Jubal.